I had every intention of writing something before the year ends. I even have a title ‘Cough’. I could give you a thousand guesses what this post is going to be about, and I can bet even on the twelfth hundred guess you still won’t have got it right. Go on. Try.
I have it all in my head. It’s funny, well, in my head. But all I’ve done since the festivities started is sleep like that fat hedgehog I posted yesterday (If you didn’t see it just imagine a really fat hedgehog blacked out on a bed). In fact, I was sleeping so much if I didn’t know otherwise I’d have been worried. Mùndù mùùgì ndarì mìheere ya ùhoro. He he. That’s the kikuyu version of if you know, you know.
I was mentally doing a recap of my year and the general description for me is plateau. I feel like it’s just been. Nothing major happened. No major achievements. No high highs and no low lows. Just there. Flatline. Like the continuous hum of a generator.
I’ve had a lot of fun little moments. I’ve met incredibly wonderful people. I’ve become closer to some people. I’ve grown 😅😅. This is physically. I’ve been told enough times by people. Last week I saw someone who I haven’t seen in exactly a year and they told me nimekuwa kanono 😅😅. Eeehh mimi. Mjue kule mtaishi . But also, growth as a person. I think my favourite aspect of growth is how I’m more vocal. Things I’d normally let pass? Not anymore. I’m still working on balance because as someone who used to ‘it’s okay’ my way out of conflicts, sometimes, a lot of times, it feels like I’m spoiling for a fight.
Njesh told me it’s a pendulum. See how you let it go and it swings from one extreme end to the other? I’m at that stage but a pendulum always finds it’s way to the middle. Balance. Who’s Njesh? Well, Njesh is my sister’s friend. And my brother’s. But most importantly, Njesh’s dad and my dad were friends. Like we have photos of Njesh and her gorgeous, glorious hair at home waaaay before I was born 😅.
Speaking of friendships, I saw a post that said “I’m not cutting anyone off because I don’t hang out with people I don’t like” and I feel like this too. This has been a good year for friendships. Though I feel like every year is a good year for friendships for me. I am extremely blessed by the friends I have. It’s like God picks out the most solid people and puts them in my corner. I LOVE IT HERE🥰🥰.
Next year I plan on being outside a lot. I’m dropping this bored persona I had this year. I was extremely boring by the way. If I wasn’t working, I was home. Or fighting for /with my back. You know what? I’m blaming my back 😅. We’re leaving that in 2024. I used to be the life of the party. Or is it an age thing? I don’t know. All I know is that there’s this very gorgeous green dress, kind of scandalous (read Wa Nyambura would probably burn it if she saw me wear it😅) that I bought from Yvonne (namnunue nguo kwa Yvonne @akinyiskiwear on IG. She sells beautiful clothes). Very ideal for a date. Or a picnic. Or a concert that is very organised. Preferably a day time one. Where I have a lot of space to twirl so y’all can see the double thigh high slits. And the back? That dress is a masterpiece 👌🏿. A concert that I am not being pushed and shoved. A concert where I am not fighting for my life. No stampedes please. Preferably with seats too (This has nothing to do with the dress, hii ni miaka, purely 😅) That dress? It will see outside next year. And I’ll post a photo and y’all will KNOW it is THAT dress.
I don’t know how your year was. Was it eventful? Was it calm? Was it the worst year ever? I’ve been asking around and I haven’t gotten a single “It was a good year”. A lot of “it was horrible” and “it was meh” Did nobody have a good year? Are you out there? Somebody who has had a good year? What is a good year anyway? How do you measure the goodness of your year? Or badness? Hmm
But you made it to the end. No matter what the year was. Someone told me as long as you’re alive and healthy, you’re good. Everything else is a bonus. Of course we all want big, fat, colossal bonuses. But we shouldn’t be so blinded that we overlook the seemingly small stuff that’s basically everything. Life and health? Can you do anything without them?
I hope that you have a better year. That you stay healthy. That things work out for you. That you get the courage you need to pick yourself up, work your way out of that bad habit, start a new difficult thing, take a leap of faith, whatever it is that you need to do. I hope your support system stays firm, so that they can hold you up when you’re feeling weak. That you touch more money. Go out more. Laugh recklessly, from your belly. Laugh till you cry. Give and receive the warmest hugs and grace, grace for those moments that things may not necessarily go your way. Or life will throw you a ridiculous curveball. Or those moments when it’ll just be hard, because it’s never all rosy. Thorns will be there too. Grace. A lot of grace.
I’m looking forward to 2025. Armed with a ridiculous amount of hope and a strong conviction that good things will happen. Oh. And a dream😅. Like an actual dream. Of course there’s a few things I need to do too, putting in the work nini nini, but nothing that cannot be handled.
So, tuseme aje? Let’s do this!
